Anne In Charge wrote:
Is it punishment if you enjoy it?
Well this is one of the big paradoxes in FLR.
To me, and I would like to stress that this is only my opinion, this ties in quite closely with another thread on the board at the moment that of wanting acknowledgement of the FLR.
Do I enjoy pain? No! If I slam my fingers in the door it hurts! I am most certainly not a masochist.
Would I like my wife to use her cane on me beyond the point at which it might be considered a pleasurable sensation - to the point where it HURTS? Yes!
Why would I want that when I've already said that I don't like pain?
Because, for me, this is a clear demonstration of her authority in our relationship. It is an acknowledgement of a power exchange. In a partnership of equals no one person could "punish" the other as to have the right to administer a punishment there has to be an unequal relationship where one party has authority over the other. If you walk into a court of law, you are not of equal status to the judge. He or she has the authority to determine and administer punishment.
So, to my way of thinking at least, craving punishment is not necessarily craving "kink" per se, but craving a demonstration of authority, an acceptance of an unequal relationship where our wives are in a position of authority over us...
Now, whether or not our wives chose to provide that demonstration of authority is of course a different matter.
Just my thoughts...